Blogs: The Best of Both Worlds?

For me, it’s still up in the air.  Blogs do allow access into the minds of others, but obviously in a limited way.  At the same time, a certain camaraderie can develop as you tune into thoughts of friends and famous people alike.  Hands down, I prefer the blogs of people I could totally know as next-door-neighbors.  Personally, I’ve been part of a couple blogging communities, and nothing is better than having a group of people who keep up with what you’re typing.  Even better if they send comments your way.   The downside of keeping up with blogs is that they are usually not kept on a regular or predictable basis.  You can end up checking quite often only to be disappointed.  Instead, I have accumulated a few favorites that way I usually have something to mix in with the news and Facebook checks during my daily online routine.  Blogs are so appealing because they are typically casual and almost feel like you’re participating in a conversation with the allure of peeking into people’s private thoughts.

Below, I’ve included the personal blogs that I frequently visit.  They are all public; feel free to show these blogs some love too.

If you want to get a quick, straightforward fashion fix J’s blog about fashion and life is simple, but helpful.  Check for sporadic contests and beauty&style advice that is easy to apply:

http://www.hollow-star.net/blog

Show and Tell Gallery Productions keeps a beautiful blog complete with podcasts and pictures covering the free public events it hosts in the community and the independent artists involved! Show and Tell is all about encouraging creativity and collaboration in Portland:

http://www.showandtellgallery.org

Talented Angelo Geter’s blog “Life and Times of a Poor Dreamer”  showcases his personal life with a spin toward some of his passions–music, spoken-word poetry and political issues:

http://penniesandsimiles.wordpress.com/

Kyle’s psychology and career-oriented blog offers personal insights into a young 20-something’s search for self and attempt to navigate the professional mental health world with all its quirks:

http://ithinkthismakessense.blogspot.com/

Kevin Nelson’s creative writing blog.  Here, you can read some poetry with rich images, and incredibly ridiculous dating stories whose hilarity told through Kevin’s unique perspective are truly something to appreciate:

http://ideologicalthunder.wordpress.com/

Take a look at Ray McDonald’s recently started blog about ordinary life and its inherent wisdom:

http://www.protagonist1.wordpress.org

There is so much conflicting information out there.  Laura Kirby’s food and nutrition blog highlights foods and restaurants that are particularly noteworthy for working on your health and fitness:

http://pseudohealthnut.blogspot.com/

In a clear, witty style much like face-to-face interactions with her, Kashia blogs about traveling in and around Argentina:

http://kashiathenomad.blogspot.com/

If you’re considering starting a blog, I recommend the following easy-to-operate hosts (in order of preference):

1) www.wordpress.com

2) www.livejournal.com

3) www.xanga.com

4) www.blogspot.com

Journal Archive:

“Hey

11/18/01

Hi today is so pretty outside.  It’s beautiful.  It looks like a spring morning–HA! but it’s not.  Faking it.  Okay so anyways today is Sunday.  I haven’t done anything really this weekend.  Even though I have homework.  I talked to David on Friday.  Not much there.  He said that he was going to his grandma’s yesterday.  I asked if he was going to come say hi and he said yeah.  But he didn’t come last night maybe he was planning on coming today–or maybe he was planning on coming today–or maybe he forgot about it.  Oh well he’s human right?  Yeah I guess so.  hehe.  I’m listening to music right now.  That’d be awesome if he would come say hi–but I need to go to the mall to get his present today so he probably wouldn’t come until I was gone.  Knowing my luck.  I’m really tired–last night I talked to this really sweet 8th grader named Justin.  I’ve never seen him before but I read him this whole journal and he’s like so awesome.  He listens to me and I listen to him.  We talk about each other’s problems.  Well anyways I miss Arusiag, Rebecah, Cindi, Sha-kana, Violet, Ana and Brian.  I needed those people (revolved my life around) them for so long.  I hope that they are all okay, happy & healthy.  I wish so much that I could see them again.  *Sigh*  I hope everything works out.  I really need to take a shower and get ready to go to the mall.  lol I have this really, really small hope that we’ll see him there.  Obviously I won’t but you know how that goes.  Last night I was reading this to Justin and I came to a letter I wrote in here to Justin and it made me start crying.  Grrr.  I don’t know why.  Justin (my ex) is coming down for Thanksgiving–hmmm….  Okay bye bye.

<3Me.”

Reader Prompt:

What is your favorite blog?  And, if you have your own, what is it?

Reflection Celebration Week, “Start Somewhere”

Start writing.  Journaling does ease the pain of long-term problems and helps gives direction, but can also be necessary in a more immediate sense.  A little pre-writing here and there could prove to be a good thing; however, too much can inadvertently turn you off.  Concentrate on starting.  Write whatever you need to get out at that moment without scrutinizing how it sounds.  Just put the words down.  Go.  And, see where your mind went when you let go.  The tighter you try to grasp the words, polishing them into pretty quotable pieces, the worse they work together to express what you wish to get out.  Save re-writes for school essays.

Looking back at the start, at anxious teenage journals, I just had to laugh!  Some funny and fucked up things I have done in the past:

• during a very Christian phase, a whole journal or two was written “Dear Daddy” (God) and signed it in various embarassing ways (Example: “Your lover, Nikia”)
• i used to waste paper like crazy; i only wrote one-sided entries
• i wrote journals whose main question and theme was “Does Justin like me? I just want to know. Please.”
• i’ve written down all the text messages in my box
• i used to use a lot of silly abbreviations (Example:  “neWAYz”)
• i used to write little hearts over “I”
• i wrote A LOT, way more than probably necessary, and I annoyingly repeated myself a million times (see archive journal entry below)
• i used nicknames for most of my friends (Example: “Latte”) 
• i covered every detail of every situation

No matter how your thoughts come out now, you’ll probably be able to review in retrospect and find some humor.  At some of my darkest times, I’ve opened old journals and realized that everything worked out, got better than it seemed at the time.  If it has been a safe enough time distance away from when you wrote, do a read-aloud with your closest friend.  Trade embarassments.  Confide in the hilarity of each other’s self-conscious moments. 

Check out a cringe style night near you, or make your own.  Originating in New York, this concept puts people up on a stage, old journals in hand, and no censor.  Less pointing and laughing in mockery and more of a commiseration orgy, this activity…baring the soul to complete strangers is fun and liberating. 

Journal Archives:

“continued from yesterday:

1/5/02

Hey again.    It’s Saturday night.  I need to write.  So–I am.  Wierdo alert.  Well I’m going to continue on the subject I was telling about last night.  So yeah we decided to go to Latania and Brandy’s apartments.  Latania wasn’t home (we checked there first) then we went to Brandy’s and she was there.  We hung out with her a little bit, Latania got home na dcame to Brandy’s we were all havin’ a good time and we decided we all wanted to go bowling well Latte kinda didn’t but we you know she couldn’t miss the action so she came.  Justin, me and Brandy bowled.  It was fun.  I won one game & Justin won one.  Justin gave me like a hug or high fives after every time that I bowled it was sweet.  *Smile*  Then we ate some stuff and afterwards we walked to TacoBell and sat there for a few mins.  We walked over to Fred Meyers–haha yeah I skipped most of the way it was cool I was full of energy the whole night.  I wonder why?  Hmmm…hard one.  So yada yada yada…throughout the night he kept “warming” up my hand ’cause I was cold.    We were flirting.  Went back to the bowling alley and played some videogames and then Latte’s mom came to get us.  We went to Connie’s house (my other aunt) and decided to get rent a movie–so we did we rented Hannibal.  I sat next to Justin and we like “Held Hands” as in actually held hands.  The kind you do when you like each other in THAT way.    We kinda watched the movie but kinda didn’t.  Afterwards my aunt took me and Justin home.  Justin first.  We held hands in the car.  Dropped him off and then my Aunt POUNCED on me.  Earlier that night she said “You aren’t as sweet and innocent as you try to make people believe Nikia” I was like “I don’t try to make people believe that I’m sweet and innocent.  It stung me.  I was hurt.  She went on a bit.  Justin calmed me down and told me over & over again not to worry ’bout it.  neWAYz  so we dropped him off and my aunt started in on me on how I am manipulative and me and my sister do whatever we want and we shouldn’t do what we do to our mom, BLAH BLAH BLAH  I started to talk or whatever and she screamed @ me she’s like “That’s the problem with you Nikia, you just talk over people and never let them say anything” (She was being such a hypocrite!!) she goes “I have something to say and you need to listen” or somethin’ like that.  She wouldn’t even let me defend myself GRRRRRR.    Brandy the whole night was like saying “I think that you and Justin are going out and just don’t want to tell me.”  I insisted that we weren’t.  Geez.  In the car on the way home she said it again she was like, “I still think…” so I finally got a word in edge-wise and said, “Brandy I don’t appreciate how you keep saying that I am NOT going out with him that I’m aware of and if I was it is none of your business.”  My aunt goes, “Did you ever think how Brandy felt?” I was like “About WHAT” “You’re not stupid Nikia, c’mon” she was saying it like I had known that Brandy liked him or somethin’–Brandy comes in again and says I think that’s wrong an 8th grader and a 10th grader.  I was like WHY–if you are older and in love with someone that is two years younger–doo you just ignore it?  My aunt goes “That’s different”  It was like them against me.  It made me SOOOOOOo mad.  neWAYz enough about that.  I got home got on the internet and talked to him.  He asked me out @ about 2am after a long discussion on how we definitely didn’t want it to ruin our friendship and just soem other peculiars.  I said yes on technically Dec. 27th 2001 but we are considering it the 26th ’cause we basically were without a title.  Yeah so I’m extremely happy.  Seriously.  But I miss him so much.  Reason?  Me and my sis went to Justin’s house, told my mom that we would be going to Latania’s house and back around 2:30pm.  We went to Justin’s around 12:00am and around 4:30pm Paul called Latania to see if we were there she covered for us & said we ran to the store–the she called Justin’s house and told me.  I was like oh crap.  I sense the direction it was headed.   So I called Paul and said Latania told me you said to call he got mad about us not being home and it was 4:30!  He asked how we were getting home I said Latania’s mom was gonna give us a ride home in about half an hour.  He said the worst thing possible “No I’m coming to get you” I was like “Okay.”  So me and my sister knew we were in huge crap bcuz the only thing that we could do was go get on the bus home and make up some weirdo excuse.  BAH.  We left and waited at the bust stop for a while but decided to go back call mom and tell her that we were @ Justin’s and that we left Latania’s @ two then went to his house.  Yada yada–geez it’s hard writing EVERY detail.  So we got in HUGE trouble now we are grounded for a month.  =-(  My mom said something really heartbreaking  when we were telling her that we lied.  Or rather I was.  She goes “I always thought I was lucky that I had @ least one child that didn’t lie to me.”  And she started crying.”  To top it all off we weren’t supposed to be @ Justin’s house ’cause his mom said not when she wasn’t home.  Well she walked in and there we were.  She doesn’t like me in the first place bcuz bcuz for some reason.  =/  So he got grounded for a month woops I mean a week!  lol.  So yeah.  La La.  Btw….I’m going to start working on my faith hopefully I will suceed in building a relationship with God again.  Me and Justin are there to support each other.  Last night Justin almost almost snuck over here.  After like three hours of us debating it.  He decided he wanted to.  He went out to the bustop and a police guy came to him and caught him for being out after curfew.  But he was nice and let Justin off the hook.  He said “You’re lucky that I found you and not another officer–usually we take you home and have a little talk with your parents.”  lol.  WHEW.  I’m so glad that he didn’t get caught.  That would have been SOOO bad.  BRB.“

Reader Prompt:

What was your start like? Have you looked back at old journals?  Cringe or cry as a result?  What is the funniest thing you noticed about your old notes?

Reflection Celebration Week, “The Art of Journal: Form and Function”

Reflection Celebration Week

August 2, 2009-August 8, 2009 

Though we turn to a journal because our minds or lives are going a million experiences per hour, reflection is often a solitary activity.  Physically, we sit alone to script our secrets.  I invite you to join in a cyber celebration of reflection and its benefits, that will hopefully resonate with your “real” life.  Let’s get together to discuss one of the most well-known love-hate relationships ever heard of…the self and journal.  How many times have you started one and stopped three entries in?  I want us to get together at this blog, for a week, to gush about journal goodness, share and collect ideas, and raise our pens in self-expression solidarity.  Because, I do believe that the world will be made better one journal at a time. 

Expression, whether in a crowded cafe or in a cozy personal space can be beneficial.  Plus, some thoughts simply aren’t nice, and something about letting those juicy judgments escape with noone harmed feels soooo good.  If we have kept a catalog of our lives for a while, we do occasionally look back for a good laugh, cry, or most often, cringe session (see: Cringe: Teenage Diaries, Journals, Notes, Letters, Poems, and Abandoned Rock Operas by Sarah Brown).    Track your own growth over time.  Notice your strengths and the way you handled certain situations in a kickass manner.  Pat yourself on the back for those moments of maturity and insight, and pat yourself on the head for those silly issues you internally squirmed about for so long.  Peek into your past self.  Trade in now to take in how far you’ve come.  See your life as the story it has become.  Or, if you haven’t ever tried your hand at the whole journal thing, maybe start now.  Try.  Because journaling means so much to me and has served as a centerpiece for the lives of my family and friends; because we are a culture full of voyeuristic creepsters; because something I have clumsily learned to do as I went along…something that seemed such a simple concept in the beginning (write.) has become critical, it seems right to celebrate reflection for all its glitches and glory.

Maybe you already have or may you haven’t, but from tons of experience I’ve learned that the way you journal makes a big difference.  Below is my review of journal keeping methods, which involves many choices depending on what you want to get out of your reflection.  This list is an open-ended sample of ideas and is always able to grow.  Some are suggestions I’ve come up with for creative personal record-keeping.  When you begin thinking about your writing, you will run into choices about the form (what it looks like) and the function (how you want it to serve you).

Form:

Lines/No-Lines: Maybe you want the order a set of faint lines brings to your printing.  Though, some people prefer to let it flow in that endearing lopsided way.  Either way, they do feel different.

Flashy/discreet:  This is a big one.  Do you want to go to your journal and feel like you’re opening a lavish little treasure where you keep all your deepest exhilerating fantasies or do you want to talk out your taboos in a 70 cent spiral notebook from CVS?  Do you want to feel like you are opening a present every time you write or do you just want somewhere to put your damn thoughts and ideas?  I have to admit, I did start with a Winnie the Pooh journal in fourth grade; it locked and had oddly-shaped pages with faded illustrations underneath the lines, and a fluffy cover.  However, since a traumatic episode as an early journaler with a nosy little sister and brother, I have stuck to plain old rinky dink spirals.  Nobody seemed to notice that there was a journal mixed in with books and schoolwork.  Under the radar, I could obsessively write during every high school class.  BUT, I think I’ve also coveted the fancy journals of my innocence, because I couldn’t resist decorating the covers.  After a while, I ran out of new spiral colors and decided to try new types.  Surprisingly, I went to Staples and found exactly what I wanted: a hardbacked journal (easier for writing regardless of surface and writing situation), with lines, the size of a spiral but with a unique quality.  There, I found lots of interpretations of the traditional spiral and I could decorate away.

 Daily Routine or Sporadic Free-Flowing:  In the past, people have asked me with a hint of disdain, “You don’t write down everything that happens every day do you?”  Honestly, I didn’t know how to answer, because I have at times seen my journal turn into a pretty precise play-by-play of my days, and that is what I needed at the time.  In the same breath, I rarely have demanded myself to write every single day and it doesn’t usually happen that way for me naturally.  So, having journal writing as a daily routine can really be a way you cope with a busy life or give yourself some structure or strive to keep your center, but only letting the mind activity out when it presses so hard into your ears that you can barely focus on the other trillion distractions outside may be the better way for you.

Function:

Flash Journaling

• With flash fiction (see Ernest Hemingway and others) as its inspiration, I decided to apply this technique to journaling.  Because I tend to be long-winded and very detail-oriented, I figured it was time for a change.  I wanted a challenge.  So, instead of writing full, front-and-back 8×11 pages worth of daily happenings, my newest journal consists of one small (a few lines worth) page every day.  The trick is to come up with clever ways to relate what is going on, but this option poses issues too.  I’m used to writing whenever I want, so keeping up with one entry every day has actually been hard.  Plus, I’m not used to space limits, so cramming my mental crap into such an itty bitty area can be frustrating.  Overall, though, this has been what I hoped it would be originally: a certain type of liberating in its limits…I live instead of only writing about living.

Video/Webcam Journaling

• Thought of this the other day.  Then realized that in an age of reality t.v. (What Not To Wear, Real World, ETC.), this idea seems so obvious, but I don’t know anyone who has ever kept a regular video journal.  I think the act of writing is way too appealing to me–I almost need to write, but for some this could be the way to overcome writing issues.  With a simple webcam and microphone, you can look yourself in the eyes, set a timer (5/10 minutes?) and get your gripes out.  Recordings I’ve made like this are easily saved and moved around.  Thinking further, maybe you could even make CDs so that the entries don’t clog up your computer and they can easily be dated and filed away discreetly. 

Letters

• Many people I talk to write because they want to release hot steam or confessions directed toward another person.  Keeping a journal of secret letters is a beautiful way to say everything you want to say with or without tact.  And, you’ll probably later thank yourself for all the things you didn’t say to that person.  Whether it was letters written to my boyfriend as a teenager, or letters written, as a 20-something, to my last boss after I got laid-off and to shitty roomies who shut me out, the letters I have written resolved the rage I felt within, but didn’t risk my reputation by inviting loose-cannon labels. And, those damn inflated airline charges for baggage, I’ve reacted to those in my journal too and have even sent some off to protect political causes about which I care.

Nature Journal

• Historically, this has been a very popular way to approach self-reflection while meeting the world.  To get away from lofty abstract blah blah blahing, try writing about what you can see and touch right in front of you.  Take your paper with you on a walk…urban or rural setting, no matter, and write about what in your sight inspires you.  Maybe include a pasted example of what you encounter.  The simplicity of this journal version can be so therapeutic as you pay attention to only your immediate senses…feeling the texture, smelling the odors…seeing the complexities in color around you. 

Travel Journal

• For all of you modern-day discoverers, gypsies, you globetrotters, you internationalites, whatever awesome title you want, even if you don’t want to constantly keep a journal, taking notes during an adventure can be especially helpful as an outlet for emotions and happenings going on way far from home.   Plus, you can share with friends how cool you were overseas, or savor your trip solo one more time.

Scrapbook Journal

• At one point, I attempted to make a scrapbook AND keep a journal.  I failed miserably.  I just couldn’t get the timing right.  Keeping mementos around for a scrapbook I would make in retrospect seemed like an okay idea until I tried it.  First, I didn’t have anywhere to keep the random “things” that inevitably turned to clutter.  Also, organizing the ticket stubs and napkins and pictures into smart layouts on special paper with cute little stickers overwhelmed me.  Not to mention how expensive it can be as a hobby.  So, finally I opted for the combo.  Mixing in little tangible pieces of my epxeriences when it seemed appropriate to what I had written and when it was convenient (as in, had just gotten pictures developed, or found something saved at the bottom of my purse) proved to be a much less stressful, but still satisfying way to work the scrapbook vs. journal struggle. 

Career Journal

• Although I didn’t stick with it and have noticed it usually works more during  ambitious times or when the professional life is crazy, a journal reserved for working life offers a place to confide everything you can’t talk about with your boss.   If you’re a planner and love to make goals…or think you need to start loving it, keeping a journal dedicated to your professional plans, considering your accomplishments or latest creative impulses can really help bring peace and direction to your days.  And, maybe you’ll be less likely to have that whole life crisis thing at 50. 

Blogs

• What an idea, right?  The perfect merging of personal expression with the added element of public disclosure.  Maybe people will even care enough to comment.  Eventually, you may develop a community of people with whom you trade electronic love.  Convenient because typing is often faster for people than handwriting, online journals allow you to switch windows on the computer for a lil break during a cram night of paper writing or while cranking out a proposal for work–for some, a lot easier than lugging around literal extra baggage.  Ultimately, skipping the paper saves money and conscience.  The discreetness, the total anonymity you can choose to have with no true paper trail and a made-up name, not to mention it not being under your pillow when your mom finds it, are highly desirable.  Blogs just may be the best of both worlds, except I crave the experience of journaling on paper too.  Its exactly like the way that take out tastes amazing, but the same meal made at home with fresh ingredients generates an entirely different and more special fulfillment.

From the Archives:

Each day this week, I am going to flip through one of my old journals (a different one each day) and transfer the entry word for word to here.  Already as I previewed some of my pages, this is more nervewrecking than it seemed when I first came up with the idea.  But, I’m stubborn and am going to stick with it.  For sure, what I write where I expect nobody to see is extremely racy and sometimes so sad or scary for even me to read.  But, I’m not going to censor it and I’m not going to pick and choose.  The first flip is the pick.

“2/15/06

Hello.

I am not happy today–bleh.  I am really fat this week for some reason.  I feel so overwhelmed and I just want to be sleeping my period away.  Today Jae is coming over.  He is a gangsta (for real) who thinks that he wants to do me.  Right now, I dunno why anybody would want me.  I feel so huge–thunder thighs, chubby on the sides, blah blah blah.  I am behind in classes and I need to sit back and FOCUS!  Seriously, I need to get it together.  This semester has been so good so far, but lately I have been caught up in exciting stuff, living life.  I have another boy who is “interested” in me named Jurius.  He goes to UNCC–Sport Medicine major.  He has talked to me a couple night till way late–like 2:30am and then the other day until 6:30am.

I posted a picture of me on Myspace that shows me naked and with only a red pillow–it is a beautiful and natural picture.  Mmm.

Last night Adam took me to Harry & Jean’s and there we had a $50.00 dinner–it was very very good.  Right now I don’t really want to eat anything anymore.  I feel like starving myself but I don’t have the willpower for that–I am too much of a wimp.

<3Me.  We’ll work on this!“

 

Reader prompt:

If you do keep or have kept a journal of any type at any time, please take a moment to answer this survey in this blog’s comment section:

1. Name

2. When did you begin keeping a journal?  What or who got you interested in the first place?

3.  How often do you write?

4. What kind do you use (form)?

5. What is the main, most important purpose your journal serves (function?)

6. What do you think is the most challenging aspect of journaling?  What is your favorite?

Can’t wait to read your answers!

xoxo,

Nikia